The New Kids

Directed by Sean S. Cunningham, The New Kids follows teen siblings Loren (Shannon Presby) and Abby (Lori Loughlin), still reeling from their parents’ sudden deaths, as they encounter vicious bullies shortly after moving in with their aunt and uncle. Filmmaker Sean S. Cunningham, working from Stephen Gyllenhaal’s script, delivers a slow-moving drama that ultimately boasts few attributes worth investing in and getting excited by, as the movie generally suffers from an uneventful and hopelessly repetitive midsection that slowly-but-surely drains the viewer’s already-dwindling interest – with the decent efforts of an agreeably eclectic roster of performers the only thing preventing one from checking out completely. (James Spader, cast as the smug, thoroughly evil leader of said bullies, is certainly as magnetic and captivating as one might’ve expected.) It’s clear, too, that the ongoing emphasis on unpleasant happenings, including the near-rape of Loughlin’s character, results in a ugliness that’s impossible to overlook, and there’s little doubt, as well, that the climactic violence is hardly able to pack the visceral, cathartic punch Cunningham has undoubtedly intended. (The continuing animal cruelty does little to allay the mostly intolerable atmosphere, to be sure.) The final result is an endeavor that’s lackluster and unwatchable even by the standards of a notoriously erratic genre, with Cunningham’s far-from-stylish visuals only cementing The New Kids‘ place as a predominantly worthless piece of work.

* out of ****