Maps to the Stars

The nadir of David Cronenberg’s progressively spotty career, Maps to the Stars details the exploits of several shallow, hopelessly one-dimensional characters – including an aging movie star (Julianne Moore’s Havana), a struggling actor (Robert Pattinson’s Jerome), and a mysterious tourist (Mia Wasikowska’s Agatha). Maps to the Stars announces its all-encompassing and thoroughly prevalent incompetence right from the get-go, as Cronenberg, working from Bruce Wagner’s screenplay, has infused the proceedings with a pervasively inauthentic vibe that extends to every facet of the production – with the movie’s almost astonishingly pointless atmosphere compounded by a pace that couldn’t possibly be slower. It becomes increasingly clear that there’s no real structure here, as Wagner offers up a narrative consisting primarily of meandering sequences that go absolutely nowhere – with the ongoing (and relentless) emphasis on pretentious, laughably artificial conversations perpetuating the aggressively affected vibe. The movie’s complete lack of substance ensures that the viewer’s efforts to connect with the material falls flat on a regular basis, and it’s ultimately clear that Maps to the Stars is about as interminable a cinematic endeavor as one can easily recall.

no stars out of ****