Machete

Machete, which started out as a fake trailer attached to Grindhouse, follows the title character (Danny Trejo) as he’s framed for the attempted murder of a prominent politician (Robert De Niro’s John McLaughlin), with the film subsequently detailing Machete’s brutal efforts at exacting revenge on the network of thugs responsible for his downfall. It’s rather disappointing to note that Machete remains virtually unwatchable for the majority of its padded-out running time (105 minutes? Really?), as filmmakers Robert Rodriguez and Ethan Maniquis have infused the proceedings with a pervasively tongue-in-cheek feel that grows tiresome right from the get-go (ie the novelty of the premise wears off almost immediately). This is despite an ongoing emphasis on action sequences of a decidedly over-the-top variety, with the excitement level of such moments diminished significantly by a continuing reliance on computer-generated effects (ie it’s all just so cartoonish). The surprisingly (yet consistently) lifeless atmosphere is perpetuated by a storyline that is, for the most part, hopelessly tedious, as scripters Rodriguez and Alvaro Rodriguez offer up a convoluted narrative that’s been packed with a whole host of frustratingly extraneous elements (ie this is far from the straight-forward tale of revenge that one might’ve expected and hoped for). The end result is a disastrous waste of time that is as tedious as it is misguided, and it’s difficult to envision even fans of the faux trailer finding much of anything worth embracing here.

* out of ****