I Do & I Don’t

A complete misfire from start to finish, I Do & I Don’t follows engaged lovebirds Bob (Bryan Callen) and Cheryl (Alexie Gilmore) as they agree to participate in pre-marital counseling in the weeks leading up to their wedding – with complications ensuing as the pair find themselves assigned to a dysfunctional couple (Matt Servitto’s Dick and Jane Lynch’s Nora) on the verge of divorce. It’s a pervasively stupid premise that’s employed to consistently underwhelming effect, as filmmaker Steve Blair places an ongoing emphasis on jokes and gags of a desperate and entirely unfunny nature (ie Dick randomly blurts out that his doctor “milks” his prostate once a week). Blair’s relentlessly lame screenplay is exacerbated by his reliance on cheap, aggressively bland visuals, while the admittedly talented cast seems to be working overtime in their efforts at wringing laughs from the sub-sitcom-level material. (Even the normally reliable Jane Lynch is left floundering by Blair’s astonishing ineptness, although, to be fair, the actress is responsible for the film’s sole authentic laugh as she punctuates a shocking revelation with a well-placed “hi-yo!”) The atmosphere of artificiality ensures that the expectedly melodramatic bent of the movie’s third act fares especially poorly, and there’s little doubt that I Do & I Don’t has, by the time the end credits mercifully roll, effectively established itself as a hopelessly redundant piece of work that’s best left forgotten.

* out of ****