Haven

Well, there’s no point in mincing words – Haven is a complete and utter mess. It’s hard to imagine what writer/director Frank E. Flowers had in mind when he concocted this astoundingly dull story involving the exploits of several characters living in the Cayman Islands. And it’s impossible not to wonder what talented actors like Bill Paxton, Orlando Bloom, and Agnes Bruckner thought they were getting into when they signed on. Despite their best efforts, there’s not a single compelling character to be found in Haven – and as a result, there’s absolutely nothing here to hold our interest. Not the plight of Bloom’s character, who’s had acid thrown in his face for sleeping with a local – and certainly not the complicated Paxton storyline, which has something to do with illicit activities and a cache of cash in a suitcase. Flowers postpones certain revelations presumably so he can have everything come together at the end, a tactic that’s more annoying than anything else. Admittedly, the film does start to make more sense once the pieces begin falling into place – but really, it’s impossible to care at that point.

*1/2 out of ****